Summer Sucks?
Is it just me, or does everything around here slow down after Pride?
It’s kind of a shock. I mean, here we spend weeks and weeks building the perfect float, picking the perfect music, and finding just the right pair of red bootie shorts to go with your angel wings (you know who you are, if you’re reading this, and you looked fabulous!), and in one weekend, poof! It’s all gone in a flash of feathers and rainbow sequins. And with it, what seems like the entire gay and transgender community — at least until Oktoberfest rolls around in, oh, for us queers, around September or so.
Sure, there are concerts, square dancing lessons, bingo nights, garden parties and a whole lot of other activities I’m not listing because we’d be here all day, but everything just seems to be moving in three-quarter time when the mercury passes 90. Maybe it’s because the legislature’s on break and Chris Buttars isn’t shooting his mouth off (well, outside of Saturday’s Voyeur, anyway). Or maybe it’s just the usual July doldrums in action. Hell, maybe it’s even the mercury — those 100 degree days sure make me lethargic.
Whatever the reason, the kids on South Park said it best: Summer sucks.
Well, not really. Not if you’re me, at least. I’m spending all this down time overloading on cheesy This TV movies (_Meteor_! The Sean Connery vehicle we won’t let him forget!), catching up on science fiction and fantasy books I want (and need) to read, and breaking my brain on Umberto Eco’s The Island of the Day Before. Just for fun. Oh, and flying east to attend Readercon — one of the most book-friendly science fiction and fantasy conventions around — in Massachusetts a few days after writing this column.
Seriously, geeky ones. Just because things are a little slow in the hotter months doesn’t mean that Kyle, Cartman and Stan are right. We own summer, and there are a lot of ways to show it other than indulging in all those big budget SF and action films Hollywood feeds us from Memorial Day to Labor Day (er, not that I have anything against explosions and giant robots, but still). Here are a few of my ideas for making your summer extra geeky.
1. MST3K, the home edition. It’s one thing to watch, say, Meteor all by your lonesome. But as Mystery Science Theatre 3000 taught us in the 1990s, the appeal of bad movies is directly proportionate to the number of people (or robots) watching them. So Netflix yourself a copy of Attack of the Puppet People, Manos: The Hand of Fate, Masters of the Universe (the deeply unfortunate 1987 He-Man movie) or anything other film that can only be described as sucktacular, invite a few geeky friends, order a pizza and go to town. I can tell you from experience that this is quite possibly the most fun you can have for under $15.
2. Costumed Picnic: One really popular thing I’ve noticed in a few anime and manga (Japanese comics) fandoms lately is the idea of having a picnic, a dinner or some other outing while in costume — or cosplaying, if your character comes from a Japanese anime, manga, video game or a J-Rock or visual kei (think Japan’s version of glam rock) figure, like Malice Mizer. I like this idea a lot, personally. It’s a great excuse to get out the sewing machine, do something creative, and have fun with a few or a lot of likeminded people—especially if some or all of you act in character the entire picnic. Plus, anything to freak out the mundanes, right? Seriously, if any of you are setting something like this up, let me know? I have a kick-ass costume I’d like to make, and I cook a mean jambalaya, for all your potluck needs. C’mon, cosplayers! I saw you at MountainCon last year and CONduit earlier this year. I know you’re out there.
3. Gay Lagoon Day. So, QSaltLake does this every summer, and 2009’s will be on Aug. 19. As anyone who has ever been within 500 feet of this amusement park knows, it’s one of the geekiest places in the state (I mean, last time I went it had, like, _two_ pirate rides, and this was years before _Pirates of the Caribbean_ made pirates in eyeliner sexy). So why not come down and be out, proud and geeky with us? We can even wear red Star Trek officer’s shirts to identify ourselves as gay and geeky! (Or to identify ourselves as wanting to be the first member on the away team to get shot at, but never mind).
Well, OK. I don’t own a Star Trek shirt (gasp! blasphemy!), but I’d still like to see you. So come and say hi. Summer may be boring and slow at times, but that doesn’t mean it has to suck.